Ditch the New Year’s Resolutions!
Well, it’s that time of year! Parents of hyperactive kids are beginning to breathe a sigh of relief, santa is already flying off around the world and gorging himself on mince pies and sherry, and taxi drivers are ramping up their rates to ‘Tarif ‘WTF” for all the yuletime revellers.
But once the last piece of turkey has been chomped, and every male in every household is snoozing away to the Queen’s speech, another tradition begins to rear it’s ugly head; the dreaded New Year’s Resolution. Now if you’ve been with my blog for a while you’ll remember I grumbled about these last year, for the exact same reason I’m going to moan about them now.
They simply don’t work.
Ok, that’s a bit harsh. I’m betting quite a few escape through the net and are eventually cemented into truth by the invidual who made them. But on the whole, they fail, and they do so because they put too much pressure on the person who happily declared them. Lifestyle changes do not happen in one single night. They take persistance and determination over time, and gradually become habits. If you have a resolution to lose weight, completely changing your diet and exercise regime overnight and attempting to stick with it puts massive stress and pressure on you and eventually you return to your original way of living.
I believe by making well thought out goals, whatever time of year, you can ease into whatever you wish to accomplish. So if you want to lose weight, you should write this goal down now, think how you’re going to achieve this, and then take small steps towards it. As J.B. Glossinger always says, if you work towards a goal by just 1% a day, you can transform yourself steadily, and you’ll find the transition much, much easier. As the saying goes ‘Rome wasn’t built in a day.‘
A lot of people are beaten down by life. They are on one knee, looking on as the rest of the world jog or sprint past them, wondering (sometimes in jealousy) how they’ve got the strength and luck to muster on. Some are even flat on their face, refusing to go on. The hard truth is, nobody can help you up and onwards, nobody can carry you in their arms and rush you forward like some knight in shining armour.
You have to do this for yourself. Only you hold the key.
Look up, look ahead. What’s in front of you? What does the finish line look like? These are your goals, and they can only be set by you. The problem is most people don’t even know what they are running towards, what their goals are in life. Most see the finish line as death, hoping they get there intact peacefully. And it’s over before they even have chance to wonder what the hell they did with their time on this Earth.
So carry on looking forward, ignore everyone else, for their goals will not match your own. Create the goals, and see them along the path. Get up – somehow, any way you can, grit your teeth, and start stepping forward. Even if it’s just a small shuffle at first. Before you know it, you’ll get momentum going, and suddenly you’ll see your legs begin to run, faster and faster, sweeping you towards a life you’ve always dreamed of.
And not the ticking of the clock, nor the changing of the year can ever halt it.
MERRY CHRISTMAS & HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE!
FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS, AND NEVER GIVE UP!
Breaking ‘The Secret’
Quite a few years, the directors of the company I work for decided to semi-retire (ages ranging from around 35-45). My sister was the PA to these directors and had the task of clearing out their offices. In each of the desks of the directors was a copy of a book called ‘The Secret’. Now this was long before Rhonda Byrne’s book had gained the notoriety it has today. My sister gave me one of the copies to read and I can quite honestly say it opened up a whole new way of thinking for me. This was amplified since I knew our directors had worked hard from being regular office workers (a couple were even taxi drivers!) to becoming multi millionaires in less than a few years.
Now I know a lot of people are skeptical about such books, and especially of The Secret, but I can only go off my own experiences with it. Since reading it, my life changed dramatically; my girlfriend at the time showed her true colours (things I had suspected but was made to feel too paranoid to question) and left my life – never to be seen again, in her place came a fantastic new lady – whom I adore and love with all my being (and who is as ambitious as me). Also I moved into a new home which has turned out to be the most beautiful and stress free place I have lived. And finally, my dreams of being a novelist have become a reality by a chance meeting of a woman who has now become my partner in crime and now we have our second book (this one fully written and illustrated by me) due in the shops soon.
Ok, this could all be a massive coincidence but I do feel that that book helped me in my perspective in life. After The Secret, I’ve read numerous Law of Attraction books, including the mighty Seth Speaks books. Everyday I smile, and laugh, and rarely feel sad or ill. I feel I have a fantastic life, with great friends and family. And for this I feel extremely grateful. Don’t get me wrong, I still bitch and moan like any normal person! But I guess I just believe that these books have had a huge postive outlook on my life.
That is until I ordered: The Real Secret: What to do when the universe hasn’t delivered. by Lucy McCarraher and Annabel Shaw
Strange how I would order such a book based on its title, for I do believe the universe can, and has delivered. But the glowing reviews for this book attracted me to it. What a massive dissapointment it was! It spends more time slagging off The Secret (seemingly without the authors having even read it!) and blowing away all the beliefs I’ve built up to now. The rest of the book just relays basic tips we already know (expenditure table anyone?)
One part asks if the reader dreams of a perfect life, fantastic partner, riches and fame. Its reply? ‘Dream on. They are nothing more than pleasant dreams.’ Hang on! I thought this was meant to make me feel happy! Not shatter my carefully constructed dreams! This book, costing me just shy of a tenner has now been quickly relegated to the bin!
It says 1 in 10 of self help books does more damage than good. Well Lucy and Annabel, I can quite honestly say, your book is most definitely in this damaging 10%! After reading just three chapters I felt depressed and miserable, in which nothing could lift my mood.
Its taken a few hour long online talks by Deepak Chopra to bring my beliefs (and smile) back on track. I feel happier now and my outlook on life has started to get back to its usual positive self.
Whether or not you believe in The Secret, it can’t be denied it does raise a bit of cheerfullness. And nobody, not one single person in the world has the right to tell you to forget your dreams as they won’t happen. This is exactly the kind of people I’ve known throughout my early adult life and lo and behold – they have done nothing with their own lives.
So my final words are – if you have hopes and aspirations, then DREAM ON! DREAM AWAY! Follow them, believe in them, believe in yourself, and nothing is impossible. Be happy, and the future will take care of itself. 🙂